When you walk into a room, do people trust you? Not just like you, respect you, or find you credible. Do they actually trust you?
Trust is different than likability, respect, or even credibility. And this week’s podcast guest, Anne Morris, has a framework that will change how you think about it.
I came to know Anne through her partner, Frances Frei, an award-winning faculty member at Harvard Business School who generously mentored me when I was a student there. Frances, Anne, and I share a passion for helping leaders communicate more effectively. So when Anne agreed to join me on the podcast, I was thrilled. She is a TED speaker, founder of the Leadership Consortium, and co-author of three books: Move Fast and Fix Things, Uncommon Service, and Unleashed.
This conversation did not disappoint.
Listen to the Episode
Here are 3 things to talk about from this episode:
- Trust isn’t one thing. It’s three. (Yes, 3!)
- You have an anchor and a wobble. (And so do I!)
- Leadership is not about performing. It is about serving.
1️⃣ Trust isn’t one thing. It’s three.
Anne traces the foundation of trust back to Aristotle’s three modes of persuasion: Logos; Pathos; Ethos.
She explains that trust is built on three pillars:
- Logic
- Authenticity
- Empathy
Logic means people believe your judgment is sound and your reasoning holds up.
Here’s the part that surprised me: logic is not just about substance. It is equally about style. If people cannot access your thinking through the way you communicate, the logic does not land. Anne says this is where most leaders fall down.
Authenticity means people see the real you.
Authenticity does NOT mean 100% transparency (Anne and I both agreed: that is not the goal). Alignment is the goal. Your thoughts, words, and actions are consistent. As Anne puts it:
(True!)
Empathy means people genuinely believe you are in it for them, not just for yourself. In other words, you care.
And when all 3 are strong?
“When all three of these trust pillars are sturdy and strong, trust is a very natural byproduct.”
Anne Morris
This is also where personal branding comes in. I think of trust and personal brand as deeply linked.
Anne put it this way: a strong personal brand is what makes other people willing to be guided by you. It is not self-promotion. It is showing up with enough logic, authenticity, and empathy that people want to follow your lead.
2️⃣ We all have an anchor and a wobble.
Here’s the metaphor: consider a 3 legged stool.
Not all 3 legs (or trust pillars) are the same.
One is super strong, never budges. This is your anchor.
And one is weak. This is your wobble.
Of the 3 trust pillars, which is YOUR anchor and which is your pillar?
- Logic
- Authenticity
- Empathy
Anne shared that when she’s tired, her anchor and her wobble are readily apparent. She is an empathy anchor and an authenticity wobbler.
I am the opposite; an authenticity anchor and an empathy wobbler. This is helpful information!
I see this pattern frequently in my coaching work. I recently worked with a group of pharmaceutical executives on identifying their personal brand themes. I noticed that a few of the scientists could quickly rattle off credentials, academic degrees, technical expertise (logic). When I asked about leadership style or how they connect with people (empathy), some of them went quiet. They had been focusing on one pillar.
This is not about trying to become someone else.
This is about improving your awareness regarding how you show up under pressure.
What’s your anchor, and what’s your wobble?
3️⃣ Leadership is not about performing. It is about serving.
Here’s my absolute favorite quote from the whole interview. Anne said:
Wow. True. Very well said.
Unfortunately many of us spend an enormous amount of energy wondering how we’re being perceived.
- Do I belong?
- How can I fit in ?
- How can I appear more credible?
Anne offered a simple but profound mindset shift: Instead of focusing on yourself, focus on the people you’re there to serve.
I’ve witnessed this transformation a few times in my executive coaching. The moment someone stops trying to impress the room and starts trying to help the room, they become more confident, more credible, and ultimately more impactful.
Are you impressing or are you serving?
There’s so much gold in this interview! One final idea from Anne that I loved:
The strongest leaders combine high standards with deep devotion.
What a wonderful way to describe leadership.
I’d love for you to listen to the full episode. I have a feeling it will leave you thinking differently about trust and a lot more, just as it did for me
Now, I have to ask:
What’s your wobble?
Hit reply and let me know. You can also DM me on LinkedIn. I 🩵 love hearing from you!
Have a great week!
“TALK” soon,
Dr. Andrea Wojnicki Executive Communication Coach – Talk About Talk
