I hope you had a great week!  Following last week’s podcast on Supporting your GRIEVING Friends, I thought we would focus this week’s blog on Talking with our FRIENDS!(You can skim this short email or dive in to the many links to learn more!) 



According to Aristotle, there are three kinds of friendships:

  1. Friendships of utility – it’s useful 
  2. Friendships of pleasure – it’s fun
  3. Friendships of the good – it’s based on mutual respect 

       (I would call them “functional,” “hedonic,” and “real.”)



“Dunbar’s Number” of 150, refers to the number of people with whom we can have “significant relationships.”  This premise was established over 25 years ago by anthropologist Robin Dunbar.  He now admits that number might increase thanks to social media enabling an increase in our memory capacity. (Right! We do have to remember relevant things about our friends! How many “friends” do you think the Kardashians have?)

What about “best friends”? Research shows that most of us have two. (That seems about right?)



Yes, it’s more fun to work with people whom we consider friends. We often stay in jobs longer when we work with friends.  But beware of your work friends! According to sociologist Jan Yagerwork friends can be very different versus our “real” friends. Studies have shown that many people would dump a friend for the sake of a job. (Good to know!)


?‍♀️?‍♂️GIRL & GUY FRIENDS ?

Yes, we are different. For men, family bonds are more important than friendships.  For women, girlfriends are more significant…  And what about that “platonic friend’?  Apparently that’s just not likely.  And regardless, it’s not good for your romantic relationship(Huh.  That’s awkward.)



Have you heard of “Blue zones“?  Those are places on our planet where the proportion of centenarians is unusually high.  One of the common factors in these blue zones is that friendships and social networks are strong. Apparently having a strong social network of close friends reduces stress,  helps us overcome disease and yes, may help us live longer. (Don’t forget the other side benefit – having friends is FUN!)



The People With Whom We CHOOSE to Talk!

Andrea Warnick & Andrea Wojnicki

Good friends support each other through the best of times and the worst of times – maybe particularly in the worst of times – including when we are grieving.  The learnings from last week’s podcast episode, “Supporting our Grieving Friends” may be helpful to you now, or more likely someday in the future when a friend is in need.  

Thank you so much for all of your comments about this podcast. I have two follow-ups for you:

  1. A few of you told me that you were surprised to learn that the Kubler-Ross 5-stage model (you know – denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance) has fallen out of favour.  Here is an article that briefly summarizes why.  According to our guest expert Andrea Warnick, “Kubler-Ross did some wonderful things for the field of death and dying….And she really taught people that if you want to learn from people who are dying, you need to talk to people who are dying.”
  2. The internet and other technologies (think FB, AI,…) provide new media and different ways to grieve. This Fast Company article highlights the roles of text messages, voicemails, and social media in grieving.

Honestly, I am relieved that you are “more than ok” with Talk About Talk covering more serious topics. That said, we have some light-hearted topics coming soon – including “Funny Talk” (I interviewed a stand-up comedian!).  Please do keep the topic ideas coming – the good and the bad – anything – that can help us become more confident communicators! I would love to hear your ideas for future Talk About Talk Topics.

One last thing: If you have any friends (!!!) ?who might also enjoy Talk About Talk, please forward this email or send them this link and encourage them to sign-up for the weekly email blog. I THANK YOU very much!

Have a great week. And here’s to our FRIENDS !!!

TALK soon,

Dr. Andrea Wojnicki
Founder & Chief Talker – Talk About Talk Inc.


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