Negotiation. It’s something we all do, be it negotiating our salaries, a sales price, or our childrens’ bedtimes! Read on for:
- 5 little-known negotiation tips
- 3 master negotiators
- negotiating quotes from familiar names
Let’s do this!
5 LITTLE-KNOWN NEGOTIATION TIPS
1️⃣ Don’t Be Selfish!
It’s certainly advisable to come prepared to a negotiation knowing what you want and to trying to make that happen. But many negotiators make the mistake of being too self-focused or myopic. You can benefit by considering in advance the perspective of your negotiating partner. What’s important to them? What’s non-negotiable? What might they will be willing to give?
2️⃣ It’s Not About the Money.
We should consider the motivations, the wants and needs, of both your negotiation partner and yourself. “Money” is the easy answer here, but money doesn’t usually explain what’s really going on. Negotiators are more likely focused on ego (“winning!”), status, freedom, or some other more tangible outcome (such as a new house!).
3️⃣ Getting to NO
Contrary to what you may have heard, it’s not just about “Getting to Yes.” In fact, seasoned negotiators seek “no” from their counterpart as a signal that the negotiation has officially begun. So don’t let “no” get you down! It’s means the negotiation can commence!
image: Unsplash @ cyntonn_photography
4️⃣ Try Matching & Mirroring
Tatiana Astray mentioned this in the podcast interview on “Emotions.” Mirroring people’s body language and vocabulary implicitly signals that you are prepared to negotiate productively. You can mirror facial expressions, hand gestures, and the words and phrases used by your negotiation partner to learn more about them and to put them at ease.
image: Unsplash @ tingeyinjurylawfirm
5️⃣ It’s Not About THEM WINNING. It is About YOU LOSING!
Research shows that we value outcomes higher when we think someone else made concessions. So before you enter the negotiation, brainstorm some things that you are willing and able to concede. Then, initiate the negotiation by asking for more than you want – and do so immediately. Behavioral scientists call this “anchoring.” Anchoring frames the discussion in the direction of your favor. Then, when you make concessions, the other party will feel victorious.
MEET 3 MASTER NEGOTIATORS
NELSON MANDELA (1918-2013)
- Imprisoned for 27 years for anti-Apartheid leadership and activism. First black president of South Africa. Nobel Peace Prize winner (1993).
- NEGOTIATED end of Apartheid in South Africa.
- NEGOTIATING STYLE: non-violent, patient, formal.
- “Only free men can negotiate. A prisoner cannot enter into contracts.” – Nelson Mandela
ANGELA MERKEL (1954-)
- Former physics scientist. Current Chancellor of Germany. Described by many as the de facto leader of the E.U. and the most powerful woman in the world.
- NEGOTIATED on behalf of the E.U. against Vladimir Putin.
- NEGOTIATING STYLE: rational, listens, anticipates reactions.
- “Always be more than you appear and never appear to be more than you are.” – Angela Merkel
CHRISTOPHER VOSS (b.? – )
- 24-year veteran of the FBI Crisis Negotiation Unit. Black Swan Group founder. Professor and author.
- NEGOTIATED the 2006 Jill Carroll case in Iraq, the Steve Centanni case in the Gaza Strip plus numerous international hostage cases.
- NEGOTIATING STYLE: strategic, no compromise
- “Instead of denying or ignoring emotions, good negotiators identify and influence them” – Christopher Voss
Did you listen to last’s weeks podcast on EMOTIONS? If not, I hope you will. People keep telling me two things:
- Emotions and negotiations expert Tatiana Astray is so SMART. (Yes she is!)
- This topic of EMOTIONS is highly relevant for us in our new reality (True!)
Andrea Wojnicki & Tatiana Astray
In addition to emotions, Tatiana’s expertise also covers NEGOTIATIONS. A quote you’ll hear in the most recent podcast from guest expert Tatiana Astray:
Did I mention that was episode #50?!? Hooray! ? Here’s to the next 50 episodes!
And next week’s podcast topic? COMPETITION. I can’t wait for you to hear our twist on competition….
Until then –
Have a great week and stay safe!
Dr. Andrea Wojnicki
Chief Talker & Communication Coach
P.S. Have you taken the FREE online course yet? “5 Quick Email Hacks to take control of your Inbox.” This course is FREE for Talk About Talk blog subscribers like you!
Most Recent ?Podcast Episodes:
#50 – EMOTIONS with Tatiana Astray
#49 – PARENTING TEENS & ONLINE LEARNING with Kimberley Acres
#48 – PRESENTING WITH CONFIDENCE with Andrew Musselman
#47 – COMPELLING PRESENTATIONS with Andrew Musselman
#46 – BIOHACKING YOUR IMMUNITY with Oksana Andreiuk
#45 – NETWORKING with Sharon Mah-Gin
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