Top 10 Episodes: #7 & #8 - Talk About Talk

“I’m speaking.”

Remember that moment from the 2020 election debate between now VP Kamala Harris and then VP Mike Pence?

During an exchange, Vice President Pence began speaking over her. She turned to him, calmly said “Mr. Vice President, I’m speaking” and kept going.

“Mr. Vice President, I’m speaking.”

It was a powerful moment for anyone who’s been interrupted in meetings.

“I’m Speaking”

These two words provide a clear, polite, yet firm example of how to reclaim your voice when you’ve been interrupted.

With the coming changes in US Democratic leadership and the possibility of a Harris/Trump debate, I expect interrupting to be top of mind for anyone watching it. Frankly, I can’t wait!

This week’s communication coaching newsletter is inspired by these two words: “I’m Speaking.”

What the Research Says About INTERRUPTING
How to Break in to the Conversation – SPEAKING UP
Speak Up and Make an Impact with your Strong PERSONAL BRAND

1️⃣ What the Research Says About INTERRUPTING

Academic research tells us that interruptions have a negative effect on collaboration and productivity.

That’s no surprise. When people interrupt, they disrupt conversation flow, resulting in MISSED opportunities and MISUNDERSTANDINGS.

Interrupting varies by culture, gender, and status. My read on the research is this:

Interrupting is all about POWER

(or at least perceived power)

At a cultural level, research shows that individuals from Asia tend to interrupt each other less frequently than individuals from the West, where people are more individualistic.
In mixed-gender conversations, men tend to interrupt more frequently than women and women are more likely to BE interrupted by men than by other women. This is true in both professional and personal contexts.
In terms of hierarchy, when someone more senior interrupts, we perceive it as a sign of strength and assertiveness. But if a more junior person interrupts? It’s perceived as confrontational and rude.

Again, it’s all about power. I tell my clients: If someone more senior than you interrupts, it might be rude, but it’s expected. If your peer or subordinate interrupts you, that’s when you need to do something.

How can you deal with interruption?

Smile and take a moment. Pause and take a breath. This calms your nerves and gives you a moment to consider your response.
Establish direct eye contact with the interrupter.
Say their name. This gets their attention and also directs others’ attention to the interruption.
Calmly tell them you’re going to finish your point, after which you’d be happy to hear from them: “Rehana, I’d like to finish my point. Then we can move on” or “Mr. Vice President, I’m speaking.”

You can listen to more about the research on interrupting and how to deal with interruptions in Talk About Talk Episode 128 – Interruptions.

2️⃣ How to Break in to the Conversation – SPEAKING UP

It happens to ALL of us. You’re in an important meeting and you realize you need to speak up. You’re hesitant to interrupt. You want to say something, but you can’t find the WORDS.

Here are some word prompts to help you speak up with confidence:

❓ Ask a QUESTION – Instead of apologizing or seeking permission, “Excuse me for interrupting,” or “Can I ask a Q?”, try these words: “Here’s a question we should consider…”

💡 Build on OTHERS’ IDEAS – Whether your intention is to subtly interrupt someone who’s been rambling, or perhaps you’re trying to build connection, try these words: “Building on what so-and-so said, here’s an idea…”

🧠 Speak to your EXPERTISE – Reinforce your personal brand by initiating your comment with these words: “Based on my experience.” or “Based on my expertise.”

Here’s your “cheat sheet”: I’ve created a list of 10 strategies you can use to help you find your voice in your next important meeting. (You can also listen to podcast ep.163 – Speak Up In Meetings, #8 in our top ten list. Enjoy!)

3️⃣ Speak Up and Make an Impact With Your Strong Personal Brand

A few years ago, I coached an oncologist in Europe on her communication skills – including developing her personal brand. At the beginning of our third coaching session, she proclaimed that the new personal brand was providing her with confidence and credibility. For the first time, people listened to her and she was able to make an impact. Perhaps even save lives.

WOW, right?

Did I mention I ❤️ love my job?

I think a lot about the power of developing your personal brand. Here are my top 3 benefits of developing your personal brand:

1. Personal Branding provides you with the opportunity to CREATE YOUR OWN NARRATIVE

If you don’t create your own personal brand, someone else might do so for you. If you’re strategically managing it, then you’re prioritizing the themes and choosing the words. You’re introducing yourself explicitly and implicitly every day, with the words, the themes that work for you.

2. Your Personal Brand provides you with CONFIDENCE

This is what my client was referencing above. Whenever you experience imposter syndrome or you feel like you’re over your head, remind yourself of your Personal Brand, and particularly your superpower. Suddenly your confidence is elevated!

3. Your Personal Brand provides you with FOCUS & DIRECTION

Of course you’re not good at everything, but you know you’re good at the things you’ve listed in your personal brand document. You’ve got focus and direction. And relevant, exciting opportunities are coming your way!

Are you convinced now, about the power of Personal Branding?

I have an invitation for you:

Please my upcoming free LIVE training, “Strategic Principles of Personal Branding” at noon on August 7th on Zoom.

During this live session, I’ll share some coaching tips on developing your brand, then I’ll open it up to your Qs… Bring it on!

Please join me! I’d love to meet you!